I'm a realist. Is that a bad thing?

I severely doubt you are otherwise you wouldn't be asking the question.

Most people use the word "realistic" incorrectly.

When people say "Aw Phil, you've got to be realistic" what they're actually saying is "Aw Phil, you've got to be pessimistic - and not just pessimistic but the absolutely worst and blackest pessimism you can possibly imagine"

So let me demonstrate the difference between optimism, pessimism and realism by taking the simple question: is the glass of water half-full or half-empty?

The pessimist says that the glass is half-empty.

The optimist says that the glass is half-full.

However, the realist will tell you, correctly, that the glass is completely full - what isn't filled with water is filled with a much more precious resource: air.

That's a realist: someone who sees the opportunities that the optimist see AND the the pitfalls that the pessimist sees AND a whole bunch of stuff that the other two are blind to.

The realist will ask "How could anyone have forgotten the air in the glass - especially as it's much more important to life than the water? You can live 24 hours without water but try doing that without air"

Examples:

Them: "But Phil, let's be realistic. I might fail"

Me: "Yes, you might. But is that the only option? And what are the chances of that compared to those other options? Shall we make a list of the possible outcomes and then see which is the most likely?"

Or

Them: "Answer the question: yes or no"

Me: "Those are not the only answers nor indeed are they even the correct answers. The correct answer is ...."

I cannot tell you how many times I've had those conversations.

However, if you were a realist, you would've know this before you asked the question so you're not a realist, you're a pessimist. And yes, being a pessimist is a really bad thing. Sort it out

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